The Downs and Ups
by KawaiiBaka1015
Summary: The Downs and Ups of Sasuke Uchiha working in a burger joint
1. Chapter 1

**The Downs and Ups**

Life is Joyous ………Yeah right I work at a Burger Joint. What's the name of it again Kakashi Burgers.

Heh … more like Baka Burger. Speaking of Baka's I work with one he's blonde, blue eyes and a voice that could make an opera singer look good. Anyway I work in this dump of a restaurant earning minimum wage … I think it's $6.47 an hour.

Now you're probably thinking that it isn't so bad I get free burgers and then you'd take that back when I tell you it taste like _Road kill_ (It probably is)

Now your going man your life sucks and your right, cause to make matters worse is _her_ and _she_ is so annoying with her pink hair and shimmering emerald eyes (So annoying) Now your thinking (which you are a lot) how can it get worse, IT DOES

"Teme stop daydreaming"

"Dobe shut up there's no customers"

"Yeah but Kakashi asked Sakura to restock the meat so I have no one to talk to"

"Joy" _'Meat when the hell did we get that'_

"So Teme get a girlfriend or still a virgin?"

"So dobe get a sex change or still a girl?"

"Teme"

"Dobe"

"Teme"

"Will you two shut up" we hear come from the freezer

Finally there'd a moment of silence then………

"Teme fan girls at two O'clock"

_Shit_

"Quick Freezer"

So this is where my problem begins I run into the freezer to hide from my soon to be rapist fan girls and stand face to face with Sakura with a pile of dead meat.

MY LIFE SUCKS

"**Sasuke-kun" **_Oh god there here_

"**Yo retard where my Sasuke-kun?"**

"He's not working today" _thank you dobe_

"Your lying we heard you talking to him" _Then again maybe not_

And then I turn to Sakura and she has one of those evil glints in her eyes

"What?" I hiss

"Need some help?" She asks rather slyly if I might add

"No"

"I can get rid of them" Now I don't usually, how do I say this 'accept' help and I really shouldn't have but I did

"Fine"

She smirks "Follow my lead" and with that she begins to mess up my hair and hers. _Wait is she unbuttoning my shirt_

"Ok follow me" And with that she leaves the freezer and I follow

"**I want my Sasuke-kun"**

"And for the last time that isn't on the menu" Naruto sighs

"Don't worry Sasuke it wasn't your fault" _Wait why did Sakura say that_

"**What not my Sasuke-kun fault"**

Sakura ignores her and turns to me. Now she's buttoning up my shirt "We'll try again later" _wait what later_

"What's wrong with Teme" Naruto's getting curious, so am I

Sakura turns to Naruto a cheeky smile on her face. "I thought Sasuke told you" Naruto shook his head like a dumb idiot

"Um well you see Sasuke has a problem down there"

GASPS

SNICKERS

AND MY DEATHLY GLARE WERE HEARD

"**No Sasuke-kun prematurely ejaculates" **_GOD I 'm going to kill Sakura_

"No worse, he can't get it up" _Yes the worse death possible_

"**Sasuke say it isn't so?"**

I clench my fist trying to hold back the anger I'm feeling

"It's true and we've tried everything and here I thought the freezer would help arouse him, you know with my erect nipples and all" _Oh shit bad thoughts_

"And now I'm just starting to think he's gay"

"**No Sasuke-kun"** And then as if like magic they ran out of the store, while Sakura's laughing and goes back to her meat duty

"Pssh Teme" _Oh great here it comes_

"You pitching a tent for two" he moves his eyes to my pants

What the hell is he talking about?

"What dobe?" he sighs "Your sausage is half done"_ Great he's making fun of me Sakura is so dead_

"Teme got milk"

"Shut up dobe"

"TEME LOOK AT YOUR PANTS"

I look down _Oh shit _I quickly cover up what little dignity I have left.

My life sucks.


	2. Sasuke's Revenge?

**Chapter 2**

**You asked for it so here it is**

Revenge is a dish best served cold that is unless your working at a burger joint then it's with a side of fries.

It had been about a month since the _'incident' _and well as Sasuke's fan girls had left him alone there was the problem of fan boys. Yes you heard it the news went out that _'supposedly' _Sasuke was gay and now he has the same sex after him.

During this month Sasuke has been planning his revenge, waiting for the perfect moment when Sakura lets her guard down (which isn't often when you're working with Naruto.) Anyway today was the day Sakura will patty …. I mean pay for what she did.

"Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaahhaahahaahahaha"

"Teme, why are you evil laughing?"

_Oh shit_

"Because I've finely gone insane"

"Ok just don't make a mess"

_Nice to know he cares_

Now you're wondering his awesome, totally radical and unique plan, well I can't be stuffed describing it to you so we'll just take a peek into Sasuke's mind.

_Tomato_

_Tomato_

_Tomato_

_Oh wait sorry_

_**My Revenge (step by step)**_

_Sakura comes to work in approximately 20 minutes_

_Kakashi as always put her on meat duty, don't know why that weird pervert_

_Now we 'freshly' crush our meat into the patties that we sell (gross)_

_I've rewired the machine in so that it won't work (for awhile)_

_Sakura while have to go in to fix it. Our uniforms are faulty in the fact they are one pieces and are very loose._

_Sakura's humiliation (did I mention it was the lunch hour rush)_

**DING**

_That'll be Sakura_

"Hello my youthful workmates"

"Lee, what are you doing here?"

"I'm taking my cherry blossoms shift; she is on a youthful journey. Oh no the meat machine is broken"

_Great Sakura's not coming_

_Bummers wait Lee shit-_

"Lee wait-"

**VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm**

"**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" THE SCREAMS OF DOZENS OF UNSUSPECTING COSTUMERS**

"Oh god Lee my virgin eyes" Naruto screams for cover

In all the commotion a customer walks up to me "Nice try Sassy but just remember I'm always one step ahead of you, one step ahead" She winked and giggled to the exit.

Sasuke learnt two things that day-

. Sakura can read his mind

. And Lee wears a G-string


	3. Meaty Sasuke?

**Chapter 3**

**I know how much you love this story that's why I'm answering your demands and writing this so enjoy**

This is it I shall have my Revenge.

Sakura has ruined my life for the last time.

Ok maybe the last time was my fault but honestly how was I supposed to know Lee _'shiver'_ wore that. And now everyone and I mean everyone thinks I'm gayer, that is after they found out I rigid the machine (Is that even possible)

And I will never forget the horror that followed

**Flashback**

_All the costumers had fled, all that remained was a semi-naked Lee, a trembling Naruto hiding under the counter and a mouth wide open Sasuke._

"_Why do you wear that?" Naruto finally got up the courage to speak out but was pale as a sheet_

"_But it offers great support for my youth and not to mention flexibility"_

**End Flashback**

_GAAA The horror_

Well payback was near and there's no way Sakura can read my mind.

Yes you guessed it I'm wearing foil on my head. I don't care how stupid I look if it keeps her out of my mind like the dobe said I'm happy. He said something about aliens and foil protecting your mind.

"Hey Sasuke-san"

"Hey" _HN Hinata's here_

"Is Naruto-kun working?"

"Hn" _translation I'll get him_

"Ok thanks" she blushes like crazy

"DOBE YOUR GIRLFRIEND"

"Hina-chan" a head pops out of I don't know where, jumps over the counter and GLOMPS onto a now RED Hinata.

"See ya Teme, got my date" He waves goodbye

"Hn"

-------

"Naruto-kun, why is Sasuke-san wearing foil on his head?" Hinata whispered as they walked to the exit

"He's pretty vulnerable lately, thinking Sakura can read his mind, so I told him to wear foil"

"Why?"

"Ok because the Sakura foiling his plans thing when…"

"What?"

"I told her"

"Naruto"

Naruto began to nervously laugh "Wait until he finds out the foil thing only works on aliens"

---------

"Hey tin man, what the hell are you wearing?" Sakura's mocking voice came into ear shot

Sasuke jumped and pointed an accusing finger at her "You can't read my mind"

Sakura chuckled and began cleaning the register area "What's so funny?"

Sakura turned to him and smiled "I can't read minds" "I know because I'm wearing this" he pointed to the hat "No Naruto told me what you were doing"

Sasuke became frozen _"Dobe"_

_---------  
_

"ACHOOOOO"

"You ok Naruto-kun"

---------

Soon he boiled over a chucked the foil on the floor stomping on it like a mad man. Then he faced her an evil glint in his eyes, she know to well

Sakura began stepping away "You know it's only the two of us" Sasuke snickered

Sakura made a run for it, to her haven but Sasuke had longer legs and arms

So maybe the freezer wasn't the best option

**CLANK**

"Now it's time for payback"

Now just imagine you're stuck in a freezer. With a man (Now if you're a man I feel sorry for you, unless you like it that way) And he was what you call _'Creepy old man face'_ at you what would you do ……… Well Sakura started throwing meat at Sasuke.

"What the hell Sakura stop"

"No pervert, Bad boy away"

"Sakura STOP" Sasuke flopped on to Sakura. His body weight restricted her movement. Sakura soaking back tingled as Sasuke breathed so close to her. Sakura felt dazed, lust filled eyes.

"Sa-su-ke" she whispered

Sasuke smirked "Yes"

Sakura moved to his pants "Eat MEAT"

Shoving a handful of meat down his pants, Sasuke yelped at the freezing mush as it made its way through his pants to his underwear to his manhood.

"Fuck" Sasuke rolled to the side, as Sakura took the opportunity to make a run for it.

Sasuke hated his life from the meat in his pants to the fact of the big pointy problem the meat had caused, Sasuke had a tent again.

'_Darn her sexiness'_


	4. Devious Sasuke?

**Chapter 4**

"Teme I'm sorry"

"Get back here Dobe so I can patty your ass"

"NO leave my buns alone"

"Oh god you guys have got to stop with the burger puns"

Sasuke had got his Revenge

On Naruto ……… still not Sakura

And I'll just say Naruto won't be sitting down anytime soon _'BBQ BUTT'_

"Teme did you have to put the stove on so high" Naruto whined rubbing his dairy air.

"It's what you get for being a tattle tale"

"But Teme she gave me the look _'If you don't tell me what he's planning you'll wake up in the middle of the night castrated' _that look and I need my balls Teme it's what makes me a man"

"Yeah because you have no penis and all, Dickless"

The two boy's turn to the voice "Sai"

"Yeah Dickless, Emo chick"

"What do you want?" Sasuke seethed as he held back a demon like Naruto from jumping over the counter to claw Sai

Sai looked up checking out the menu "Can I get an Ichi ichi paradise burger"

"Ok that'll be $4.50"

"Is it really an orgasm in your mouth" Sai questioned

"Yes" _More like a puke fest_

"Naruto we have a clog" Sakura yelled from the back

"Coming" Naruto made a dash

"Ugly still working here"

"Yes" Sasuke looked up at Sai slyly _'What's he getting at?'  
_

"I don't see why she's so frigid"

"WHAT" came a wall shattering screech?

"You're the one that slept around, man whore" Sakura came storming from the back

"Well maybe if you were more intimate I wouldn't have had to" Sai shot back

"What's going on?" Naruto came out wearing a pink frilly apron and holding a plunger

"Man I have the strangest friend" Sasuke mumbled to himself

"Well?" Naruto tapped his foot and held his hips like an angry housewife

Sakura sighed and took a deep breath "Sai and I used to date, **a long time ago**"

"**WHAT"** Screeched apron boy and foil kid

"It was a long time ago, he had a cute butt back then, but then he started wearing those belly shirts GOD THEY WERE SO GAY" Sakura defended herself

Everyone turned to Sai to see his response "Yeah she just had a nice rack, but was like so Nunish"

Sakura went for a killing strike only to be stopped by Housewife Naruto

"Sakura calm"

Sakura soon gave up "I'm going on my lunch break" she mumbled and left

"See you guy phobic" both men unknown to Sai gave him deathly glares

"Naruto, why don't you get Sai his burger he's been waiting ever so long, remember to add the _'special sauce'_" Sasuke winked to Naruto who had a devious grin growing on his face.

"But of course only the best" Naruto chuckled

-------------

Sakura returned a half an hour later to a whistling Naruto and a smirking Sasuke.

"What did you do?" She inquired

"Nothing" they both snickered, which only rose Sakura's curiosity

"Naruto did you unclog the sink and take out the rubbish"

Fox boy grinned "But Sakura I only did the recycling" and then began to chuckle and evil chuckle which Sasuke soon joined.

"No you didn't"

"Yes we did"

"We could get sued"

Sasuke shrugged "Wouldn't be the first time"

"Why?" Sakura shuffled her feet

"Because trash deserves to eat trash" Naruto huffed

Sasuke chuckled "He insulted you; no one is aloud to do that but us"

Sakura smiled taking the boys in a warm hug and kissed Sasuke on the cheek

"Thank you"

"What about me?"

"You have Hinata"

"But ……'

"Don't ruin the moment"

Everything seems happy at Kakashi's Burgers _for now._

_------------  
_

"Why is there hair in my burger, AAAHHH something just moved?"


	5. Dense Sasuke?

**Chapter 5**

**I would just like to say I love all of you that have faved my story, me as an author or just reviewed it means a lot to me so I give you Chapter 5 and **_**'cyber hug'**_

"Ok my faithful employees, today's a big day with our new release burger _'Ichi ichi paradise- Sex on the beach'_" Kakashi shone

"Isn't that an alcoholic drink name?"

"Yes and so you must all be prepared for millions of customers"

Naruto put his hand up "But Kakashi- Manager the only people that come here are Sasuke's fan girls and fan boys and they don't buy a thing"

"Hn"

"We should sell RAMEN"

"Naruto for the…" Kakashi began counting his fingers "1000 … 1069……Yes for the 6969 time NO"

Naruto sighed and turned to whisper to Sakura "Maybe he'll say yes to the 6970 time I ask" Sakura tried to hold back snickers and whispered "You should try"

-------------------

"Hey Ino-pig"

"Hey forehead, what you want?" Ino ran to the counter

"Want to be the first to try sex on the beach"

"Been there done that, Forehead"

Sakura turned bright red "Um-um"

"Don't act so surprised forehead I told you Shikamaru was an animal"

"I meant the burger" Sakura pointed up

"Oh"

--------------------

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAH" Naruto took off in a roar

"It's not that funny" Sakura hid her head in her hands, her face boiling over.

"Yes it is, she HAHAHA"

"Shut up"

"Geez Sakura you've never really done it have you"

"No I mean the closest I've been to a guy was when I shoved meat down Sasuke's pants"

Naruto turned to Sasuke shocked and confused "It's a long story Dobe"

"I have time"

"No you have Kakashi's time, were on the clock get back to work"

"Since when do you want to work, what were you going to do to our innocent Sakura-Chan"

"Have sex" Sasuke replied bluntly

Naruto tumbled over and Sakura's Jaw dropped "You were going to do me in a freezer"

Naruto jumped up "IN A FREEZER"

"If I remember correctly it was your idea"

"That was 4 chapters ago, why do you still remember it"

"I never forget" Sasuke stated proudly

"Or forgive" Naruto mumbled rubbing his behind that still hurt from the previous chapter

"Shut up dobe"

"Teme"

"Sasuke" Sasuke turned to the female voice, her face was still as red as a tomato

_Mmmm Tomato_

"Hn"

"Can you teach me to be more l-like flirty and good on dates?"

Sasuke felt a sweat break out on his back. His breathing was hitched, had he gone to heaven cause it sure felt like it "HN, sure"

"Thank you Sasuke" she took him into a warm hug

"Naruto you can be our waiter" Sakura chirped

-------------------

Sasuke and Sakura were both seated at a booth. The nervous twittering of Sakura's hands and the tapping of Sasuke's feet was beginning to piss Naruto off

"So-"Sasuke slaughtered for a topic

"Do you like ch-"

"Don't you dare say cheese, Teme"

Sasuke sighed "Um"

"Have either of you ever been on a date"

Both shaking there heads, Naruto had a giant throbbing vein mark.

"Teme compliment her"

"I love your … Uniform"

Naruto smacked his palm on his forehead "No Teme like this' Taking Sakura's hand in his own pushing Sasuke to the side "Sakura" her head focused on Naruto placing a hand on her cheek, which made Sasuke fume. "You have the most beautiful eyes" Sakura began to blush like crazy.

"Naruto-kun how could you?"

Naruto froze at the voice "H-Hinata"

"YOU SAID MY EYES WERE BEAUTIFUL"

"They are, I was only helping out Teme" Naruto pleaded running after an upset Hinata, leaving Sasuke alone with Sakura again

"Sakura" she jumped at the sound of her name

"Yes Sasu-mmff" Sasuke leaned over the table and planted a deep kiss on Sakura. He moved his hands to her waist and lifted her up over the table and rested her onto his lap. Moving one arm up to her neck so he could deepen the kiss, while the other had kept her in her place around the waist, her hands moved up around his neck causing the motion of her to go up and down arousing him down there, Sakura moaned and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth.

Breaking apart moments later, taking deep, ragged breathes. Sasuke smirked "Freezer"

Sakura gasped slapping him and pushing him away

"Cocky ass Jerk" getting up and leaving

Sasuke sighed noticing his big problem and returned again

'_Darn so close'_

_---------------------  
_

"Hinata please anything but this"

"But Naruto if you really love me"

"Anything but giving up Ramen for a week"

"Then I guess you don't-"

"I do, I mean I'll do it"

"Yeah Naruto-kun I love you"

"Me too, I love you"


	6. Romantic Sasuke?

**Chapter 6**

** _"Tou-san, Tou-san I love you so much please don't leave"_**

**_ "But I must my love, war is coming I must keep you safe"_**

**_ "Oh Tou-san I love you so much, please spend one more night with me"_**

**_ "How can I resist"_**

"No Riku it's a trap, he's cheating on you"

"Naruto what are you watching?"

"War and … um"

"Since when did we get a T.V. in Kakashi burgers?" Sasuke butted in

"Yeah, since when?"

Naruto scratched the side of his head "Um since Kakashi discovered the porn channel"

"WHAT?" Sakura cracked her fists

"What's the title again?" Sasuke interrupted Sakura's rage

"War and … Whores"

---------------

"Dobe, what's happening?"

"Riku the main character loves Tou-san but he's cheating on her with Karin. Karin is a evil witch from the underworld bet on stealing Riku's broken heart. Sam is the one on the right he's an orphan and loves noodles and has a crush on this girl Hina and secretly masturbates and has wet dreams about her. Right now were finding out that that Tou-san is really a robot simulated to look like a human and the real one is in an underground secret cave of Karin's, chained up naked and Riku is making love to metal"

"And they have a sex scene every five minutes in this" Sasuke added

"That too"

"You guys make me sick" Sakura seethed

"HEY you're watching it too" Naruto bellowed

"That's not the point"

---------------------

**_"Ah ahha ah Tou-san faster"_**

**_ "Hn"_**

**_ "Harder, faster, ah deeper"_**

**SOB**

**SOB**

**SOB**

"Sakura you ok?" Naruto assured

"NOOOOOOO"

"What's wrong?"

"It's so beautiful"

"?"

"With the evil witch and robot Tou-san and masturbating boy"

"Um Sakura it's a porno"

"I knoooow"

"Hey Saku…"

"Sasuke promise me, promise me you won't get captured by an evil witch named Karin and leave me alone in a room with masturbating boy. Then let your robot counterpart ravish me senseless while you're chained up in a cave baring all and I'm humping metal"

Sasuke stood there wide eyed "Ok"

"No you have to promise"

"I-I I promise"

"Really Sasuke I love you" While this was occurring Naruto began to look from the screen to his two friends

"Um Sakura you ok"

**_"Um Riku you ok"_**

"I am now I have you Sasuke"

**_"I am now I have you Tou-san"_**

****"Sakura"

**_"Riku"_**

****"Sasuke"

**_"Tou-san"_**

"Yes I know it" Both love birds jumped at Naruto's statement

"Know what?"

"It's true I know it's true"

"What's true dobe?"

"PORN BRINGS PEOPLE TOGETHER"

**YAY DONE I JUST HAD MY DRIVING LESSON, MAN I'M BEEFED AND NO I DID NOT KILL ANYONE, YET**


	7. Drunk Sasuke?

**Chapter 7**

"Teme I've done something brilliant"

"That's a first"

"No I'm being serious, numb nuts"

"What did you call me?"

"Oh please we all know your not getting any"

"Hn"

"Ha see Sakura's your girlfriend and you still ain't getting physical"

"It's more complicated"

"Oh sorry Teme wants to wait until his hair turns grey, ewww old people sex"

"Shut up I'm waiting until Sakura's ready"

"And while you're waiting for her to be ready, every time you get your problem you-"Sasuke covered his mouth

"Don't say it" Removing his hand slowly

"Don't say what?"

"You, know what"

"No, no I don't"

"The M word"

"Menopause"

"No mastur…"

"MASTER, geez Teme didn't know you were into the dominance thing so literally"

"NO MASTURBATION" There was an awkward silence

"HAHA TEME MASTURBATES"

'_I'll kill him'_

'**No buy your time he could be useful'**

'_Shut up'_

"Anyway Teme you want to hear my brilliance"

"No"

"Oh come on"

"Fine"

"I switched the Soda machine so it now disperses Alcohol"

"Hn"

"WHAT THAT'S ALL I GET FOR MY GENIOUS"

"Hic- S-Sasuke-kun-hic I wuv-hic you" came a slurred voice

"Oh shit" sounded Naruto

"Dobe I kill you"

"Na-hic Naru t-the sod-woo tAsteSSS differ-hic"

"Really I wonder why" Sasuke glared in Naruto's direction

"Sassy-hic"

"Sakura sit down"

"NOOOOO I WANNA-hic DO IT"

_Oh fuck_

"Plwz Sassy-hic"

"Sakura please don't do this to me"

"But Sassy-hic you make me so wets and horny, finger-hic-ing myselfs no work no-hic more"

_Oh fucking hell_

"We-hic can do it-hic in the freezer"

_Oh popsicles_

"I wants yous insisa me-hic, powing so harwd and me screamin yours-hic names until I orgasm and you relez insisa me"

_Oh Glacier_

"Sassy taks me I'm urs-hic"

_Oh…_

"No"

"Nuh-hic"

"No I won't take advantage of you, I love you and want both of us to remember our first time"

Sakura then smiled "I know it, Pay up Naruto"

Sasuke froze _'Wait what?'_

"What?"

Sakura turned her attention back to Sasuke "Oh sorry Naruto said that if you ever had an opportunity to do me you would take it. I told him no because you love me and wouldn't take advantage of me and I won I love you Sasuke"

"It was all a bet"

"Yeah but-"

"I got a hard one and I said no to sex because I thought you were drunk"

"Sorry Teme …"

"Stay out of this Dobe" Facing Sakura "You're going to relieve me of this"

Grabbing her wrist he dragged her into the freezer

"Sasu-mmff" he kissed her hard and rough

Pushing her down, so she was on her back and he was above, it's the male dominance. "Sasuke please d-don't" She pleaded over the strong muscular man that was above her.

He ignored moving a hand up her T-shirt to cup her C-cup breasts "Ah ah-Sasu-ah-ke s-stop" He smirked at the sound of her delicious moans.

'_Better than a porno'_ he thought

He lifted her up so her back was arched and he began to slowly slide down her pants, revealing her nice wet womanhood. He began to slide his finger around it, tickling it "No ah-s-stop" Sakura pleaded again

Sasuke couldn't take it anymore; he began undoing his pants, sliding them down with his boxers to reveal his pole. Sakura began to wriggle, keeping her legs closed

"Stop it, Sakura you brought this on yourself" he forced her legs open. And then the unthinkable

She began rubbing her leg, on his hard on

The immense pleasure he felt was insane, so good that he groaned out in pleasure and released all over her leg. Collapsing Sasuke fell on his back. Sakura then collected her clothes and stated "There I relieved you of it"

Sasuke just laid there shocked she gave him a leg job, was that even possible.


	8. Feminine Sasuke?

**Chapter 8**

Sasuke was ice cold …… well I mean colder than usual. I t could have been the fact that Sakura wasn't talking to him after the _'incident'_ or the fact Naruto was at his ear constantly about it

"Teme, stop being such a butt face"

"Hn"

"Don't worry it will roll over soon" _Oh no it won't_

"Dobe, I almost raped her in a freezer"

"I know, I was just outside" Naruto stated plainly

"My point I would have done it in front of you, God I have no self control"

"Nah dur" Naruto hollered

"What do you think I should do, I'm crazy for her?"

"Isn't it clear Teme make it up to her, you embarrassed her so embarrass yourself?"

And for the first time the Dobe said something Intelligent. Sasuke jumped over the register and headed for the exit.

"Teme, where you going?"

"To embarrass myself"

"No Teme you can't leave me alone remember last time?"

"Dobe it wasn't my fault you left the gas on and blow up the store and had no eyebrows for a month"

"You still remember that?"

"So does the fire department"

"Well not that, the one after it"

"Again Dobe not my fault, how was I supposed to know the circus was in town and you're the one who kept peanuts in you're pocket"

"The clown was asking for it"

"There was an elephant behind him you idiot"

"Well shut up, it wasn't that one, the one after that one"

"Which one?"

"The one with the transvestite"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow

"You don't remember?"

Sasuke shook his head

"Everyone else remembers but you"

Sasuke nodded

"Well ok you can go" Naruto whistled

'_I never understand him'_

_-----------------------------  
_

**DING DING**

"What we have a customer?"

"Hey there lover boy"

'_GULP'_

"No need to be shy"

"HELP TRANSVESTITE"

----------------------------------

"Naruto its ok the he/she left" Sakura comforted

"Is it a guy or is it a girl, who knows I shore don't" Naruto whimpered in the fetal position

**DING DING**

"NO its back" Naruto clung to Sakura. While Sakura's eyes widened in disbelief "Sasuke"

Naruto swiftly turned "Teme I'm so glad your back you won't …… WTF? Teme"

It was insane; no way could this ever have happened. I mean for this to have happened the devil must have donated to charity and God would have started spitting on people from heaven.

Because Sasuke stood in front of them in a Toto dancing the Macarena, HELL NO OR HELL YES

_**When I dance they call me macarena  
and the boys they say that I**__**'**__**m buena  
they all want me, they can**__**'**__**t have me  
So they all come and dance beside me  
move with me jam with me  
and if your good i take you home with me  
A la tuhuelpa legria macarena  
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena  
A la tuhuelpa legria macarena Eeeh, Macarena**_

"Sasuke, why?"

"Sakura please forgive me"

Sakura smiled "Yes, for now" She warned

So all was happy _'for now'_


	9. Dominant Sasuke?

**Chapter 9**

"So Teme, how are you and Sakura doing?"

"Hn fine"

"But?"

"It's been a week and she still insists I wear the Toto"

Naruto snickered under his hand "But it's so your colour"

"Really, I choose it because it was Sakura's hair colour … Hey"

"BWAHAHAHA"

"I kill you"

-------------------------------------------

"Teme"

Naruto ran into the stool were Sasuke and Sakura were currently making out. Sasuke groaned disappointed and angry when he turned to Naruto.

"What dobe I'm busy?" he emphasized to Sakura, who was currently wondering how she had gum in her mouth when she wasn't chewing any before

"I'm sorry it's just…" he leaned closer to Sasuke and whispered in the ear furthest away from Sakura "We have a problem"

Sasuke let out a low growl turning to Sakura "Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back"

Sakura sighed "I can't go anywhere, you handcuffed me to the chair" Sakura lifted up her hands to show the dangling metal restricting her from moving away

Sasuke smirked "It's handy when your dad's the chief of police" and turned to follow the dobe to see what the so called problem was

He went into the back room to see a very guilty and nervous Naruto "What is it?"

Naruto gulped "Promise you won't hurt me"

"I can't promise that, now hurry up and tell me I have a pleading Sakura to attend to"

Naruto scratched nervously the back of his head "I broke the key"

"What key?"

"The ones to the handcuffs"

"You must be mistaken there in my … YOU WENT THROUGH MY BAG AGAIN"

"Please Teme don't hit me I was curious to what they opened and they got stuck in a door and snapped"

"Don't worry Dobe I brought a spare"

"Dropped that down the drain"

"I KILL YOU"

"Um- Sakura" came a nervous blonde voice

"What is it Naruto" Sakura sighed playing spit ball with napkins and a straw

"…"

"Tell her dobe" Sasuke pushed Naruto lightly on the shoulder

"Tell me what?" Sakura bulls eyed a picture of Kakashi's face

"I lost the keys" Naruto blurted

"Keys to what?"

"The handcuffs"

"…"

"…"

"NARUTO" Sakura tried to grab him bat was flung down back into the seat because of the_**'handcuffs'**_

Naruto ran so far there were reports of an orange blur on the moon

------------------------------------

"Sasuke what do we do?" Sakura whined about the problem

"How about were we left off" and he lead down and started the make out session again with the added bonus of Sakura deepening the kiss trying to pent out her frustrations with tongue actions added

_'I'll tell her about the third set in my pocket later this is too good'_


	10. Feline Sasuke?

**Chapter 10**

"Sakura, Sakura" wailed a distressed Naruto

"What's wrong Naruto?" Sakura turned her attention to a black cat in Naruto's arms

"It's Teme"

"That's nice and the cat is"

"_**It's**_ Teme" Sakura looked from Naruto to the cat, noticing Naruto's serious look and the cats blacken blue fur and dark onyx eyes

"You serious" Sakura gave him a skeptical look

Naruto whimpered "Yeah me and Teme were walking to work as usual and I looked away for a second and turned back around to find Teme's shirt and he was a-a-a CAT"

"Don't worry Teme I'll take care of you" Naruto hugged the feline, squeezing it tight

"Sssssssssssss" The cat hissed

"Naruto I think you killing him" Sakura panicked

"No he's fighting with me in cat speak, I hate you too Teme, I hate you too"

Sakura sweat dropped "Um- Naruto pass him over" Naruto passed him over to Sakura. The cat began to purr and nudge his head into Sakura's mounds. Sakura squealed "Sasuke stop that tickles" The cat continued with an evil smirk on its face.

"Sakura see it is Teme, He loves you" Naruto grinned

Sakura smiled stroking the cat as it relaxed in her arms "Sasuke"

----------------------------------

"Meow"

"Meow"

"MEOW"

"What is it Sasuke?" Sakura patted his head and scratched under his chin

"You hungry" Sakura smiled grabbing a carton of milk and pouring it in to an empty bowl

The cat licked up the liquid happily; Sakura happily sat down stroking the cat "Sasuke" the cat looked up at the sound

"I love you" Sakura leaned down, closing the gap between them. She kissed cat Sasuke

"NARUTO" screamed a furious, now every shocked at the scene in front of him, shirtless Sasuke

Sakura quickly whipped her head away from the cat to come face to pants with a pissed off Uchiha

"But you're a cat" Sakura muttered before she fainted

-----------------------------------

Sakura felt all groggy as she came too she heard two voices yelling/arguing

"Teme you were a cat"

"No I wasn't I was attacked by fan girls while you were chasing a squirrel. They ripped off my shirt and by chance it happened to land on a black cat, you are such and idiot to think that cat was me. And the only reason I escaped from being raped was because they began fighting over who would go first"

"Oh"

"AND THEN I STORM IN HERE TO SEE SAKURA MAKING OUT WITH THAT CAT"

"Sasuke" was a low whisper

"I-I'm sorry" Sakura began to weep

Sasuke frowned taking Sakura into his embrace "Don't cry" Sakura began to wipe her face with her sleeve

Sasuke smirked at how cute and vulnerable she looked "Did you really think that cat was me?" Sasuke stroked her hair

"He acted like you" Sakura mumbled into his chest

"How so?"

"He was ferrous to Naruto, he loved being close to me and being touchy-feely" Sasuke growled and lifted Sakura up on to the work bench.

"No animal can touch you" Sakura blinked "Sasuke are you jealous of a cat"

Sasuke blushed hiding his face in Sakura's mounds "Yes"

"But I only kissed it on the forehead"


	11. Jealous Sasuke?

**Chapter 11**

"Sasuke, Sasuke"

"What now, Dobe?" Sasuke mocked

"No, it's Sakura she's with another guy and they were hugging"

**CRACK**

**BANG**

**POW**

**KABOOM**

**KAPOW**

**PING**

"Teme couldn't you have used the door, I mean it was right next to the wall"

"Ah man I'll get the dust pan and brush, stupid Teme"

----------------------------------------

"It's so nice to see you again Sakura"

"Sasori same here, how have you been?"

"As good as the luckiest guy in the world can get"

"Who is she?"

"Her names Chi-Chan"

"She sounds sweet"

"She is and a little wild"

Sakura stopped dead in her tracks "Sakura you ok?"

"What is with you men and telling me how good your girlfriends lay?"

"You seem like a guy to me" _Ow snap_

"SAY THAT AGAIN" Sakura latched to his back and began nuking his head

"Take it back" Sakura whined

"No Saku-Kun Haha" Sasori smirked dropping Sakura

------------------------------------------------

Sasuke was furious, Sakura was cheating on him (or so he thought). So here he was storming the streets going to give Sakura a piece of his mind.

"Take it back" that voice that was definitely Sakura

"No Saku-Kun" that male voice he's going down, literally

And then Sasuke literally out of the corner jumps, leaping like a tiger catching his deer, like a gay man at a bar finding so nice ass, like … well you get my drift he flew. Knocking a now shocked Sasori to the ground and don't get me talking about the position.

There was Sasori outstretched beneath a growling, wild, rabbi dog … I mean Sasuke.

Who was sitting up right (Sasori was the bitch)

"Stay away from Sakura" barked Sasuke

Sakura who witnessed the scene was still shocked and God did Sasuke look hot in that position.

"Um-"Sasori well didn't know what to think

"Who are you?" Sasori finally asked

"I'M SAKURA'S BOYFRIEND" Sasuke yelled

Sasori looked towards Sakura "You sure can pick them sis"

_Sis?_

Sasuke then looked to Sakura with the most adorable lost face and Sakura began to laugh nervously "Um Sasuke met my brother Sasori"

"Brother?"

"Yeah he just came back from puppet school"

"Um sorry" Sasuke muttered

"That's ok, do you mind getting off"

"Oh yeah" Sasuke leaped to his feet, holding out his hand to Sasori to help him up

"So why you tackle me?"

"I thought you were stealing my Sakura" Sasuke mumbled

Sasori laughed. It was not the best first impression

----------------------------------------------------

Sasuke just finished work when he walked outside to find Sasori

"Hey" he called

Sasori walked up close to him "Let me make this quick, dump my sister"

"What why?"

"She's too good for you, Uchiha"

"**GRRR **NO I won't"

"Do it or I'll destroy your whole world" he lifted up a photo, showing it to Sasuke

"No you wouldn't"

"I will, you have 24 hours"


	12. Photophobic Sasuke?

**Chapter 12**

**Recap**

Sasuke just finished work when he walked outside to find Sasori

"Hey" he called

Sasori walked up close to him "Let me make this quick, dump my sister"

"What why?"

"She's too good for you, Uchiha"

"**GRRR **NO I won't"

"Do it or I'll destroy your whole world" he lifted up a photo, showing it to Sasuke

"No you wouldn't"

"I will, you have 24 hours"

----------------------------------------------

_What do I do I can't let my Sakura see that photo. That photo will ruin everything I can't have it no Sakura can not see it. Then I guess I have to break up with her._

"Sasuke are you ok?"

_It's now or never. I wish it was never_

"Sakura we need to talk"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

"Naruto get off me"

"No Teme I now about the photo, you can't let it break up the youthful love you have"

"Dobe?"

"Lee's got to me, believe it"

"What photo?" came Sakura's voice

"Nothing" yelled Sasuke

"Teme don't do it, I saw Sasori he's evil you can't let him break you up" Naruto whispered

"But the photo"

"Sakura will understand"

"No she won't"

"Sasuke what's going on?"

"Sakura-"

"NOO-mm" Sasuke covered Naruto's mouth

"I'm breaking up with you"

_Oh_

"What why?" Sakura felt tears pricking her eyes

"It-"

"IS IT MY FOREHEAD, I KNOW IT'S TOO BIG BUT-"

"No it's not that"

"IF IT'S ABOUT THE LEG JOB I'M SORRY"

"No-"

"IS IT BECAUSE I'M A BAD KISSER, I CAN WORK ON IT"

"No it's not you it's me"

Oh no Sakura was angry

"How dare you Uchiha use that line on me"

"Saku-"

"But you're right it is you, it's always you, well fine Uchiha it's over" Sakura finally let the tears fall as she ran

"Nice job Teme" Naruto grumbled as he walked away

Sasuke collapsed to his knees "I'm sorry Sakura"

--------------------------------

"SAKURA WAIT"

"What is it Naruto?" Sakura rubbed her red eyes, looking away from Naruto

"It's not Teme's fault" _You can't say I've never helped you Teme_

"How can you be defending him?"

"Sakura listen it was Sasori"

"My brother you have to be kidding me"

"No Sakura it's true, he has something against Sasuke"

"Leave me alone Naruto"

"No Teme loves you, when he talks which is rarely it's always about you"

"Liar"

"No if you want proof follow me"

-----------------------------------

"Nice job Uchiha you kept to you end of the bargain"

"Where's the photo?"

"I think I'll keep it to make sure you stay away from my sister"

"That wasn't the deal"

"Don't worry I won't show her if you stay away from her"

Sasuke clenched is fists "How can you live with yourself, I love your sister"

"Whatever"

**CRACK**

Sasori and Sasuke turned towards the noise "See Sakura I told you"

"…"

"…"

"Brother how could you?"

"I did it because he's a Uchiha, the are bad people"

"Not Sasuke he's different"

"No he isn't they are all the same, they say they love you and that you're the one but as soon as another man comes along your last weeks trash"

"Sasori?"

"No I won't let you get hurt like I did I won't let another Uchiha male hurt our family"

"Wait what male?" Naruto panicked

"Sasori's gay" Sakura formed him

"I won't let another Itachi Uchiha break you heart, so look at this Sakura" Sasori chucked the photo towards Sakura

"No don't look" Sasuke called out as Sakura picked it up from her feet, as she looked at the photo her eyes widened

"BWAHAHAHAHAH" Sasori busted out "It's over Uchiha, she'll never love you after this"

"No now you know the truth" Sasuke turned away

"Sasuke" Sakura came closer to him taking him into a warm embrace

Sasori was shocked "No you should hate him"

"I don't see the problem so what if you were a chunky baby" and there she held a photo of a really chunky and naked baby Uchiha Sasuke.

**KB: The moral of this chapter is, burn all you baby photos**

**Sakura: Wait a sec but I love Sasuke's baby photo**

**KB: Burn, Burn, BURN**

**Sakura: You have fire issues**

**KB: BURN**


	13. Foolish Sasuke?

**Chapter 13**

"Hello my wonderful under paid employees" Said a cheery Kakashi

"What is it, Pervo-Sensei?"

Kakashi turned dark and storm clouds began to form; inside the store

HOLY KANOLY

"The health inspector is coming"

"So" Naruto huffed while picking at his belly button

Thunder was heard "Clean up the store or one of you gets toilet duties for a month" Everyone stopped what they were doing

"No don't worry my youthful cherry blossom, I'll protect you" Lee leaped into the air ready to hug said person

When **BONK**

He got a palm full of Sasuke

"She's mine" he held her possessively, a said person again turned red as a tomato

"WA Sasuke-kun" Sasuke smirked, finally a –Kun

"Who is this inspector anyway?" Naruto finally asked

--------------------------------

Two men in black

Men in black, walked to their nearby black Mercedes. One hopping in with ease and sex appeal, the other a clumsy something

"So what we checking out today, boss?" the something asked with admiration and love for the other

"Kakashi's burgers" the other grunted

"Is that the place that guy, what's his name got food poisoning"

"Sai"

"That's the one"

"Hn"

"Itachi, why are you so cold to me?"

"Shut up, Kisame"

Itachi turned the key to the Mercedes and took off to there destination

"Hey Itachi, it says an Uchiha Sasuke works there you related?"

"He's my little brother"

-----------------------------------

"Yo hurry up and clean"

Sasuke was currently scrubbing the ceiling "Oh God I think something's alive up here"

Sakura was bent over scrubbing the floor "Sasuke you can't see my underwear right?"

"Of course not Sakura"

'_She's wearing the white lacy today so innocent'_

Naruto was OH NO

"Don't worry Naruto use the youthful force"

"I'll youthful force you" As Naruto placed a gas mask on

(Darth Vader sound Effects)

Naruto walked into the toilets

1

2

3

4

5 Seconds later …

"Aaaaahhhh the gas mask does nothing"

"Glad I didn't choose the short straw" Lee flashed his trademark pose

"Fuck you Lee, Fuck you"

"Naruto get back in there" Kakashi demanded

"No it smells like sex and period of over 6 months"

"Naruto back in" Kakashi picked up a broom

"NO" Naruto ran as Kakashi swung the broom, bad luck for Naruto that Sakura scrubbing the floors made it slippery and Naruto slipped into the ladder Sasuke was working on. Sasuke fell and landed on an unsuspecting Sakura, Sasuke groaned as he placed his hands on the floorto pick himself up.

'_The floors softer and squishier then usual almost like Sakura's…'_

"Sasuke can you stop feeling me up?"

"Hello we are the inspectors and … Wow Itachi look at your brother go at it with the hot pink head _PURR"_

"Foolish brother have you no dignity"

"ITACHI" Sasuke yelled but did not move

Itachi blinked "Isn't this the part where you attack me?"

"Yeah but…" Sasuke resumed squeezing Sakura's breasts

"Ah Sa-Sasuke" Sakura moaned

"Itachi, why don't you do that to me anymore?" Kisame whispered

Itachi's faced turned blue like Kisame's "Once was enough" Itachi felt like he was going to puke remembering that night called _'Itachi/Kisame intimate moments collection'_

"Nah Sasuke don't go under" The girls voice snapped Itachi out of his horror movie

Itachi walked over to Sasuke, lifting him up by the belt. Away from the pleading girl

"Itachi put me down" Sasuke whined like a child at the loss of his Sakura

Itachi scoffed at his loser of a brother

"Let's inspect this store Kisame" Itachi dropped Sasuke in to a mop bucket and began to inspect the store

-----------------------------------------

"Well Mr. Kakashi your store somehow has reached minimum standards again" Itachi groaned as he handed over the approval forms

"What can I say, I'm great"

"Ku Ku" angry coughs were heard from behind

As a red as a tomato Sakura

A Sasuke sitting in a mop bucket

A Naruto with a gas mask and plunger and

"Where's Lee?" Sakura asked and Naruto snickered

-----------------------------------------

"Someone help me, it stinks in here"

"Youthful Naruto unplunger me"


	14. Late night Sasuke?

**Chapter 14**

**Sorry it's so late I have had none stop exams for the past week, only one more left CHEMISTRY YAY**

"Nah Teme I hate working late night" Naruto whined as he swirled his finger on the counter in liquid he hoped was soft drink

"Go home then" Came Sasuke's monotone voice from under the counter

Naruto sighed" Teme I am not going home for the last time just so you can be alone with Sakura" groaning Sasuke placed his head in between his legs

"Blast so close" he mumbled to himself

"Teme I don't see why you don't just take Sakura to your house?"

"Brother"

"Her house?"

"Parents"

"Love hot-"

"Don't even think about it"

"Car wash"

"…?"

"Hey don't knock it till you've tried it"

"I think I'm going to puke"

"Teme your so …"

"Chicken"

Both boys turned to the sudden out burst person" Sakura what the hell?"

"I felt it was called for" Sakura shrugged as she moved towards her workmates

"I'm not a chicken Sakura" Sasuke huffed showing his cute little pouty face that Sakura loves

Sakura leaned down sitting next to Sasuke under his Emo counter. Taking him into a warm and cozy hug "Sasuke you're my chicken" Sakura mocked

"Sakura you're so darn sexy when you tease me"

"Gross do your sex talk somewhere else"

Sasuke looked into Sakura's eyes "Kakashi's office?"

Sakura giggled "You bet"

Sasuke's eyes widened at her sudden response, he leapt to his feet placing Sakura over his shoulder "Wha Someone's enthusiastic"

"Well it isn't everyday your girlfriend agrees to go into a secure room with you"

"Well it isn't everyday we work late night"

"Man I love late night" Sasuke smirked his world famous, totally magnetic and Greek god smexlicious smirk (Uchiha smirk is owned and operated by Uchiha Corp. If anyone is found copying the Uchiha smirk your house will be trampled by giant ants, have a nice day)

Now in Kakashi's office

Sasuke knocked all of Kakashi's belongings of his desk (Mainly those orange books and strangely a shirtless picture of a guy named Jiraiya autographed an all)

Placing Sakura on the desk he began kissing, licking and nipping at her neck. Moving up Sasuke began to lightly touch her chin and cheek, claiming her lips he moved his hands to her lower cheeks and began to press firmly on both. Sakura gasped giving Sasuke the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth. He moved in tasting her sweet crevasse, he felt like he was in heaven and had just won the heart of the most beautiful angel.

As he moved his hands from her cheeks, one rose to the zipper of her top. Slowly unzipping her regulated work material from her chest area, while never breaking from the kiss. He moved to the clamp of her bra, having difficulty removing it. Sakura broke the kiss moving her hands to assist him.

"I could have done that" Sasuke grumbled

"But we don't have all night, chicken"

Sasuke growled at the mention of that word "You're going to get it now" Sasuke deemed as he removed his shirt and the power went out

"What the?" Sakura blurted

"Who cares" Sasuke groaned

"But I don't want my first time to be in the dark"

Sasuke leaned down on the desk beside Sakura frustrated "What else can go wrong?"

**CRACK**

**BAM**

Kakashi's desk broke

"Stupid mouth"

And then …

"Teme's ego strikes again" Came Naruto's voice from afar

-----------------------------------

**The next day …**

"_Going to make some burgers with no real meat _

_Going to sell them for 25 a piece_

_Going to laugh at costumers as they walk,_

_In and out of the store cause that's just me" _Kakashi sung to himself as he unlocked his office door, stepping inside

**1**

**2**

**3**

"NO JARIAYA WHO DID THIS TOO YOU?" he held onto the photo clutching it tight when his eyes caught something, a name tag _Uchiha Sasuke_

"CURSE YOU UCHIHA, CURSE YOU"

---------------------------------

"Sasuke you ok sweetie, is that tomato off"

"No mum just got this strangest feeling, it's nothing"

"Ok have fun at work"

"I always do"

**There done for now, so please review and give me any ideas to put in my next chapter, love to hear from you**


	15. Admit it Sasuke?

**Chapter 15**

"Uchiha"

"Manager"

"You broke my desk"

"You put _'security' _cameras in the ladies bathroom"

"To shay, to shay"

-------------------------------------------------

"Dobe what are you doing?" Asked a very confused Uchiha

"What does it look like?"

"I don't know that's why I'm asking what it is you are doing."

"Yeah Teme don't have a lot of time cause my girl and I have to fly" Naruto moved his left arm around Hinata's petite frame, as he gave a sly wink

"And the reason your doing this?" Sasuke judgmentally asked Hinata

She began to fidget her fingers and her face turned a pinkish colour "N-Na-Naruto wanted to" she replied stuttering slightly

Naruto pulled his sheepish grin "See Teme my girl doesn't say no to me" he kissed Hinata lightly on the cheek which made her tumble over "Ah Hinata"

"Dobe" Sasuke mumbled "You still haven't answered my question"

"And I told you I'm in a hurry so give us two large shakes"

"But why are you using the drive through"

"I wanted too"

"But you don't even have a car you're just pretending"

"No I'm not you just haven't seen my new model the 'invisible mobile'" Naruto sparkled with glee

"Lame" and then was shot down by Sasuke's statement "Just admit you have no car"

"Just admit you haven't been laid yet"

_Oh it was on_

"Admit you sleep with a Kakashi plushy"

"_GASP _You swore you never tell" Naruto growled as Uchiha showed a triumphant smirk "Admit you read Kakashi's _books_ when he isn't looking AND you imagine the girls in them are Sakura" which soon disappeared

"You knucklehead you've been spying on me" Sasuke blushed furiously as Naruto now had his turn to show a triumphant smirk "Well it's sort of hard not to notice when all you hear in the cubicle next to you is 'Ah Sakura' or 'My my aren't we a naughty girl' well isn't it"

"They were private moments"

"In a public restroom"

Sasuke felt his jaw click in anger "Admit you liked it when we kissed that one time"

"Please it was like kissing my Grandma"

"Your Grandma's dead"

"Exactly, dead lips"

"Well at least mine aren't like a waterfall it was like I was drowning"

"You take that back you choir boy"

"Oh no, you didn't"

"Oh yes, I did"

Sasuke leaned over the check out of the drive through grabbing Naruto by the collar he pulled him into the store through the window "Unhand me Teme you child molester"

"I'll molest you"

"Yo- wait WHAT?" Naruto froze gathering up what Sasuke had just said and seeing the realization in his eyes

"Um well Teme would you look at the time I have to go" Naruto slipped out of Sasuke's grasp, as he ran outside picking up Hinata and making a dash for the nearest safe house

----------------------------------------------

"Sasuke what's wrong?" Sakura questioned as she arrived to work with a very Emo Sasuke

"You wouldn't understand" he mumbled

Sakura sighed "You and Naruto got into a fight _again_, and because of you superior lack of social skill you said something that made Naruto flee in fear, am I right?"

"Darn how do you do that?"

"It's because I know you two all too well and I know how to make you feel better"

"How?"

"You. Me. Restroom. I'll give you one of those mind-blowing hand jobs you love so much"

At this Sasuke jumped from his seat, pulling a smiling Sakura along with him into the men's restroom, locking one of the cubicles

Sakura undid his fly, moving her hands to the hem of the boxers

Pulling them down in a slow teasing manner

Sasuke groaned out in pleasure as Sakura wrapped her small hand around his member, rubbing it with her thumb in a circular motion

Sasuke's head faced the ceiling and his hands banged against the edges on the cubicle

Sakura pumped her hand up and down increasing the speed, you could hear Sasuke moan "Ah Sakura" or "My my aren't we a naughty girl" from inside the restroom

_The Dobe will never know_


	16. Competition Sasuke?

**Chapter 16**

**Competition Sasuke?**

A dark aura arose and crackled at the sight the horrible sight. His girlfriend was eating a sandwich

But it was no ordinary sandwich, as it was from a rivaling store

"What the hell are you doing?"

His girlfriend turned to him with a mouthful of her club sandwich "Mmmm"

"Chew"

"I'm eating Sasuke-kun"

"Where did you get that from?" Sakura quickly scratched her head in a nervous manner "Um some store can't really remember the name" she giggled trying to hide her guilt

"Liar" Sakura's eyes widened "You're a traitor" Sakura stood up prudently, shaking with anger "So what they have good sandwiches"

"Sakura"

"Don't Sakura me, you're just jealous"

"Over a sandwich"

"No that I buy food from your childhood rival"

"That has nothing to do with it" Sasuke haughtily huffed in denial

"Are you sure, because I swear he winked at me when I bought my sandwich" Sakura teased

"YOU CAN'T GO THERE AGAIN" Sasuke's eyes went a dangerous red colour

"Not jealous huh?" Sasuke turned away in a frenzy, mumbling something but Sakura couldn't be stuffed to ask him to repeat it

**DING DING**

The quarreling couple turned

**BAM**

Naruto skydived through the roof, pointing a finger at the man who dares to enter

"IT'S GAARA OF THE SANDWICH"

With that he picked up his parachute and walked towards the exit "Where you going dobe?"

"I said my line" Naruto shrugged

"And the parachute?"

"My 'invisible mobile' broke down and I had to get here somehow" and with that Naruto skipped to the exit and traveled all the way to Hinata's houses to have _hot_ and _steamy _ramen

"Hello Uchiha" his voice was eerie full of bloodlust

"Gaara" Sasuke willingly spat his name

"I see you girlfriend likes _'my' _sandwich" at this the Uchiha grunted. Sakura remained behind Sasuke munching on her sandwich

"Sakura stop eating that"

"No I paid for it so it's mine"

Gaara began to snicker a dark snicker in the background "See Uchiha my Sandwiches have a mind of there own no one can resist them"

The Uchiha felt himself about to snap with the munching and the laughing and the laughing and the munching it was inevitable

That's when the Uchiha got an idea; he leaned in close whispering three words that made Sakura drop her sandwich in disbelief, as the sandwich plummeted to the ground. Gaara fell to his knees "NOOO" picking himself up he glared at the Uchiha "This isn't over no one can resist the 'Sandwich barrier' (store name)" and with that he left the store

Sakura looked up at Sasuke, her eyes sparkling with joy "Really?"

"Hn"

"You really mean it?"

"Would I have said it if I didn't" Sasuke smirked as he leaned in close to Sakura

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

"_I will cook"_

Because seriously when will, an Uchiha ever say that

---------------------------------------------------------------------

"Sasuke by the way what did you mumble before?"

"What?"

"You know when I said you were jealous"

"Nothing" Sasuke shot

"Come on"

"It was nothing"

"Tell me"

"No"

"Please"

"Hn"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

"_It's cause I love you"_


	17. Bloody Sasuke?

**Chapter 17**

**Bloody Sasuke?**

It was one of those days again, Sasuke was glum and nobody knew why?

Could it have been because Naruto had still not fixed the hole in the roof and the suns rays was ruining his complexion

Of course not

Maybe it was because Kakashi kept on pointing at him yelling _'Demon child'_ that guy can sure hold a grudge. What was it like a week since he broke his desk?

Creepy Pervert thing he was but no it was not that either

What could it have possibly been to make Sasuke's glare deep fry the fries better then the deep fryer. Let me give you a hint

Pink hair

Green eyes

Still nothing …

She's named after a tree

Do I have to spell it out?

…

…

…

OK

S-A-K-U-R-A

Yes Sakura

Why?

She was avoiding him

Another BIG WHY?

* * *

"Teme, why you so down?"

"Hn"

"I see you lost your testicles"

"HN" a little louder

"And a lap dog ate your penis"

Sasuke head was forming multiple stress marks "I'm so sorry Teme to hear that, but look at the bright side you don't have to pass on your angst gene"

Sasuke snapped tackling Naruto to the ground "SAKURA'S IGNORING ME"

"My God you are like a love sick puppy"

"Me love her" he whimpered with puppy eyes "You are whipped man"

"When did it start?" Naruto subconsciously agreed to help him; he blamed it on the puppy eyes

"Well … Yesterday"

**Flashback**

Sasuke had just arrived at work to find disheveled Sakura, she was admitting a killer aura, but Sasuke was to love struck to notice

"Sakura" he smirked as he approached her

Twisting her head towards him, she tried to give of a kind smile but the smoke alarm didn't think so, as it automatically turned on the sprinklers on the roof. Adding more to Sakura's aura

Still Sasuke remained love blind only seeing a happy wet Sakura (pervert)

Once the sprinklers had done there routine they switched of and Sasuke took the opportunity to start his routine, flirt with Sakura

"So Sakura do I really make you that wet"

And they kept coming …

"Is it just me or does my big fish want to go swimming in your pool?"

And coming …

"My seamen are all ready to set sail"

And then the next thing Sasuke noticed was his nose was bleeding and he was on the ground and Sakura utter the five cursed words

"I HATE YOU SASUKE UCHIHA"

**Flashback ended**

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah she punched me right in the nose and stormed off"

"No those pick up lines they were terrible"

Naruto just received a face full of salt "Dobe?"

"Huh?"

"What do you thinks wrong?"

Naruto shrugged "Probably her time of the month"

"What times that?" Sasuke was oblivious

"Sakura has her rags"

"That's not nice Sakura's clothes are very nice" Sasuke defended his love

"Sakura has her period"

"I didn't think we had school yesterday" Seriously how dumb could a man be so Naruto put his lame mans terms into use

"Every month a woman goes through a cycle called the period, this is when a female bleeds out of her vagina, also contains mood swings and cramps etc."

"…"

"Hey Teme you ok?"

"…"

"Teme?"

"SAKURA'S HURT" Sasuke made a dash for the ice cream machine in the back where Sakura was currently working

"Sakura"

"What is it Uchiha?"

"I understand you're having a period"

"What?" Sakura blushed frantically

"But don't worry I'll wait as long as it takes for your vagina to heal"

"Idiot" Naruto seethed in the background

Moral of this RANDOM chapter is …………

So you think that Uchiha's know all think again


	18. Protective Sasuke?

**Chapter 18**

**Protective Sasuke?**

**DING DING**

"Oh my God" Sakura jumped with glee from behind the orange counter, which got the attention of Sasuke _'She's happy we got a costumer'_ Sasuke wondered confusedly

"Long time no see" Sakura giggled as she jumped over the counter taking a MAN

Sasuke stood dumbfounded

They were hugging

Sakura + another man = Not a happy chappy Sasuke

Sasuke cleared his thought trying to make his presents known

Sakura turned to Sasuke "Hey Sasuke I like you to meet my childhood friend Suigetsu"

The man that Sakura introduce in Sasuke's eyes looked like one of those buff player guy's but in reality or Sakura's eyes he looked like a shark

"It's nice to met you" Suigetsu extended his hand in a polite manner showing of his razor sharp grin, which to Sasuke's vision was pearly white smile

Sasuke reluctantly accepted not wanting to make Sakura have another vagina incident

Sakura smiled like a seven year old as the two boys shook hands. On the inside she sighed with relief that Sasuke did not do his macho man act, especially the last time he did it only to find out the guy Sakura was hanging with was gay and had a slightly creepy interest in Sasuke's rear

Oh Deidara, where are you know

"Well I'll leave you two to get to be the best of mates" Sakura skipped to the back room

"Don't you think Sakura's grown out in all the right places" Suigetsu chuckled

Oh no Sasuke felt his macho self begin to crawl, it took all the power of his womanly feeling side to hold it down

He kept chanting in his head _'For Sakura, For Sakura'_

But then …

"I mean if you weren't here I probably would have jumped her"

_Snap_

_Plop_

That was the sound of his manly side escaping and the womanly side falling in to the depths of his mind

All that was left was a faint whisper _'No for Sakura'_

_Screw Sakura, ha that wasn't a bad idea  
_

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

"Sasuke, where did Suigetsu go?" Sakura popped around the corner

"Oh he had to go fishing" Sasuke monotone answer came

"Oh ok" Sakura felt slightly depresses

Then she noticed that Sasuke was eating something "What you got there?"

Sasuke smirked holding up a teaspoon "Shark fin soup, want some?"

"Of course" Sakura took a seat on Sasuke's lap as he spoon fed the girl, which then turned into the I won't give you any game if you don't kiss me, then into a passionate mouth to mouth feeding.

All that was left was a faint whisper "mmmmmm"

As Suigetsu was sticky taped to the ceiling watching the two go at it right in front of his eyes

All the Uchiha could do was smirk

And Sasuke's womanly side screamed _'Sakura's mine biatches'_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

**DING DING**

**(insert a petrifying womanly scream)**

"Sasuke what's wrong?"

"Sasuke-Kun yeah"

_Oh God no_

"Deidara stay away from me"

"But that plump ass of yours is just calling for my dick yeah"

And then Sasuke said the dumbest thing in the history of dumb, I mean dumber then Naruto dumb

We will never know why he said it, it was probably just on impulse, but let me tell you Sasuke my stay a virgin for a long time

"Only Sakura can do that to my ass"


End file.
